Updated: Apr 22
How to Take Charge:
1. Break from Social Media
Society has a way of making us feel like we’re not enough. FAKEbook and social media does too! As soon as I log in I see people traveling the world, beautiful wedding pictures, happy family photos, flawless makeup and amazing fitness results. People tend to glamorize and emphasize aspects of their lives that are positive. This can lead us to feel that we are not “enough” or where we need to be in life. This can lead us to make a decision (on ourselves) based on what others are choosing to put on social media.
2. Get Organized
As they say, “a cluttered space equals a cluttered mind.” As much as I didn’t want to believe that growing up I see how true it is today. Think of how well you sleep in a new hotel room. Now think of how well you sleep when you have clothes and other items all over the bed. Make it a priority to take an hour or two to organize the spaces that you are in the most. With the main one being your bedroom. A clean space can bring peace of mind and a state of calmness.
3. Get an agenda
It’s hard to hold everything you have to do in your head or even your phone. If you try to remember everything without having it written down it can cause us to feel constantly unsettled. You have a general idea of what you have to get done each day.
4. Set Your Priorities
Focus on what’s most important. Family, friends, faith, work and health (mental and physical). Only do what you absolutely have to do. Choose what you do with your time wisely. Don’t take on events such as your neighbor’s sisters party. Those few hours can help you get organized, workout or have some r and r time. Anything that will NOT be relevant in 5/10 years should not take too much of your time. You only have so much time and energy in one day. So channel that energy into what’s the most important.
5. Stay out of gossip
With family, friends and co-workers. When someone tries to engage you in their drama simply say, “It’s better that I don’t get involved since it involves the two of you”, “I have a lot on my plate right now. I don’t have the energy to get involved in that situation” or simply, “I want to stay neutral.” You can even give a supportive statement such as, “I support both of you and hope you work it out.”
6. Don’t compare your journey to others
It’s not worth it. When we compare we often feel that we are not good enough, rich enough, successful enough or having a family soon enough. You may feel that you are “falling behind” in life. Remember that people tend to post everything great in their lives online. Rarely do they post arguments with a spouse, feeling alone in a marriage, being broke or difficulties with parenting.
7. Day By Day
If we focus on where we want to be in a few years we can start feeling overwhelmed. We can also feel that we are wasting time. Break it down and focus on day by day…at least until you feel more grounded/rooted. I am a big fan of focusing on long and short term goals. However, if you are already feeling extremely overwhelmed it is easier to start thinking of “day by day” initially.
8. Baby Steps
When combined baby steps lead to big strides. Nothing changes overnight. Take depression for example. It doesn’t immediately go away. It takes gradual, small changes that someone must make. Going to therapy, socializing more, eating better, sleeping better and healthier thoughts. When they are combined over time the individual starts slowly feeling better.
9. Go to therapy
This is my number one tip of this article. Therapy allows you to unload all your stressors or worries each week. Therapy allows you to identify some of the challenges, problem solve and helping you become the best person you can be. It can help us to feel understood, important and valued. It’s an hour a week that we are the main focus. We are the star of the show.